It can't be. Because that would mean that my time off is over. You know, my time off to be a stay at home mom. My time off cleaning house, cooking meals, shuttling kids back and forth.
Yeah, that time off.
I took the boys to school this morning and was amazed to realize they only have 4 more weeks left of the year. 4 weeks! It's gone incredibly fast. Our bank account is very excited for the summer break. One month's reprieve from the "Newman payment" is enough cause for celebration to throw a parade, in my opinion.
When I think back to last fall, I never could have imagined everything that the boys would do, see, hear, and learn this year. I am stunned at what they've been given the opportunity to do. I thought we were just sending them to a good school. God had so much more in mind. They have grown as Christians, as young men, as members of a community, as sons and brothers.
In short, they've grown.
And that is bittersweet.
Bitter = because I want them to stay my babies forever. I want them to cuddle with me and I want to sniff their hair and feel their warm smooshy bodies snuggled up against me. They are all arms and legs now. Nothing smooshy about either of the boys. Even Sissy is getting sort of gangly. And they are so smart. They read voraciously (both of them), they know things about science and history and art that I don't even know, and they know people that I wish I knew (can you say Grammy-award-winning Irvin Mayfield?)
Sweet = because they are really becoming the people that Paul and I have been praying for them to become. Warm, compassionate, empathetic, and genuinely kind.
I thought we'd homeschool forever. I never imagined this time in my wildest dreams. In other words, never say never. God has a plan, and that plan may or may not include your plans. Ask me how I know.
I keep reminding myself that God is sovereign. That He has plans for all of us. He knows better than me. I have to trust in that every.single.day.
Even on the days that I don't feel like it.